Thursday, September 28, 2017

Oregon 2017: E-Day

3:00 a.m.  Our neighbors in the next room are clearly getting ready to leave. 
Me:  Should we just get up now and go? 
Bill:  It might upset the kids.
Not long thereafter, I drop my t-shirt in the toilet, necessitating a certain amount of swearing and a lengthy session with the blow dryer.  They’re awake now!

Of course, the roads are not nearly as crowded as we were led to believe they would be.  We drive dead east through the dark along the Columbia, past The Dalles (pron. Dahls), then turn south at Biggs Junction.  We are out of the populated area quickly, passing only occasionally through tiny towns that are one street and a grain elevator, and watching a gorgeous sunrise over a wind farm.  The eclipse soundtrack plays and it is quiet and portentous at the same time. 

We consider stopping at Shaniko.  There are two streets to this town, and they are clearly gearing up for viewing – there’s a coffee stand, and donuts, and possibly restrooms.  But we have our sights set further in totality, so we drive on, now in the early morning sun, arriving not too long after at the City of Antelope, down in a valley, a street, a church, an old school building and some trees.[1]  While it doesn’t provide the high view that the folks perched on hilltops outside of town will get, it does have port-a-potties and a sign saying coffee and bake sale, 7 a.m.!  Antelope, we will watch here.  Thank you.

Not so fast, city slickers. 

There is one field down at the far end of town, sunken and surrounded by willow trees, designated for “eclipse parking” where a couple of folks have set up camp sites.  Everything is covered in heavy dew, and a mist and the quiet makes it all kind of beautiful.  But the bake sale sign at the other end seems to be where people are parking and, well, they are promising homemade cinnamon roles, so which one would you choose?   Not to mention, there is a lot of space here in Antelope, so you kind of assume you can pull up anywhere.  We park next to some other folks clearly there for the eclipse, and pile out of the car to stretch in the early morning chill.

All of a sudden a powerful woman emerges to tell us all that we can’t park here, parking is down at the other lot, this is private, posted, not permitted.  An older fellow in a blaze-orange vest confers with her and heard to say into his phone “Have you looked out your window?  You’d better get out here.”  While we parkers (there are maybe 20 cars here now) decide amongst ourselves to just stay put, and point out to Mrs. Antelope that the signs just say no overnight parking, the city fathers drive around looking suspicious.  The polite argument continues even while the ladies set up the bake sale (I don’t know who they were going to sell to if they didn’t let us park there) and a not particularly tense standoff ensues. 

Finally, it is announced that we can park here, for $20, could we please come pay at the bake sale and write down our license plate numbers so that the Sheriff can confirm we’ve paid.  Well, we don’t mind paying - $20 seems a small price for a good view of a possibly once-in-a-lifetime phenomenon.[2] 

Now a tranquil atmosphere prevails.  A few more cars pull in, but mostly people stand around eating and drinking and in our case, playing yahtzee to pass the time.  The amount of food people have brought suggests a coming apocalypse rather than an eclipse.  The little girl in the car next to us drags out a blanket and a pile of toys, and soon finds a friend just her age with the same pony.  The town fathers wander around looking at the interlopers with decreasing suspicion, and much bad coffee and mediocre but homemade baked goods are sold.  Around 9, the eclipse begins!  It comes over the security walkie talkies carried by the coppers:  all units be advised, the partial eclipse phase has begun, crackle crackle. 

But you wouldn’t know it unless you put your eclipse glasses on and saw the little tiny nibble at the edge of the sun – without the glasses, the day is perfectly clear and sunny and blue sky and golden prairie and getting really hot.  Sunscreen is loaned around.  Where-you-from’s exchanged.  We meet some Packer fans (Izzy is wearing her 52 jersey so . . .) There are a bunch of vultures hanging out in a tree, which start flying around as it warms up.  Boy, are they about to be confused, says Bill.

Now, behind the low chain-link fence next to which we are parked, there is an old school (a.k.a. the Antelope City Hall), and around that is a small collection of campers and folks setting up telescopes.  We have been enjoined from parking in there, told that the Tacoma Astronomical Society had rented the whole property for the event.  But a lady comes over and invites us to check out the view from their telescopes – which is amazing!  You can see sunspots and solar flares and much bigger images of the sun than we can through our glasses.  What a bonus. 

A total eclipse takes a while!  But we know we are getting close when the crescent shadows start to appear under a nearby tree.  The temperature cools and the light starts to dim somehow even though without the glasses on it still looks like a perfectly clear day.  The moment is nigh.

At last:  totality!  The light goes out, the corona comes on, and a cheer ripples through the assembled.  It is quiet but everyone is excited, particularly Peter and Izzy.  It is dark, and a lot cooler.  It is remarkable, and while I don’t fall to my knees and weep it is distinctly goosebump-producing and not because it is cold.  Many photographs are taken. 

When the lights come on again, not quite two minutes later, there is another cheer, and then people start leaving.[3]  The first lady of Antelope bids a polite but clearly relieved adieu to everyone.[4]  We came from Massachusetts! I tell her.  She doesn’t seem that impressed.  Have a safe drive back, she says.  After just a few miles, we join the long line of cars snaking our way out of the interior and back to civilization.  Here’s that traffic everyone was talking about. 

The truck stop at Biggs Junction is packed with eclipse viewers so we use the facilities and carry on across the river to Washington (state), to see a World War One memorial (yes!) that is modeled on Stonehenge.  Conversation overheard while checking out the names on plaques:
Woman:  Look, they all died on the same date.  Do you think there was a fire or something?
Man:  Well, the same year. 
Woman:  I wonder what happened.
Man:  Wait, I think this is during a war.
Me (internally):  weren’t you people just reading the big plaque outside that explained that this is a freaking WORLD WAR ONE MEMORIAL??!!

We make it to Portland easily after that, pulling in grimy and dust-covered to our posh hotel where we take the longest showers ever and collapse in heaps upon plush beds.  A fun dinner at a fire-roasting restaurant redeems the Northwest’s reputation as a producer of fine oysters, and further confirms the one about the wine. 

Here ends my part of the journal, as I had to return to Cambridge the next morning, for work.  We came, we saw (through protective lenses), we conquered the traffic.  And, we experienced a truly once-in-a-lifetime phenomenon.[5] 

In my absence, I anointed Peter as note-taker and journal-writer.  We’ll see what he has produced. 





[1] Yes, you read that correctly, this is the City of Antelope, thank you very much.  Apparently you are a city by virtue of your form of government.  Pop. 51 in the summer, 40 in the winter.  It is a great place to retire! says the First Lady of Antelope, who is running the bake sale. 
[2] We do see the Sheriff eventually but he doesn’t seem to be checking anyone’s plates. 
[3] But not after visiting the port-a-potty, for which there is a long line after the lights come back on.
[4] As our friend Winston put it, they have a long history of dealing with interlopers in Antelope.  For a brief period in the 1980s, this town was known as Rajneeshpuram after a cult set up on a nearby ranch.  The group grew quickly, and built its own airstrip and hotel and tried to formally annex Antelope.  There is a quite complicated story here, that involves a mass poisoning at a salad bar in The Dalles, which was the first act of bioterrorism in the US, and a bombing at a hotel in Portland.  It is really quite fascinating, and we knew nothing of this when we decided to stop in Antelope.  But one gets the sense that they have not forgotten.  Just google it for all the details. 
[5] Until 2024, when we will only have to go to Vermont.  But who know what can happen between now and then!

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